This post was going to be about Lolkick Sims, but then my mood changed. So I thought, "Hey, Pirates 4 was AH-MAY-ZAH, so I'll review this instead." Yeah, seriously.
You could say that was a kind of thesis statement; the movie was certainly amazing. Going into the theater to see the movie, I wondered how the movie would be able to compare with its predecessor, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. I thought that movie was also AH-MAY-ZAH. I remember the epic battle at the end of it, the way the plot tied everything together, and the way that the fates of Will Turner, his father, Davy Jones, and Jack Sparrow all intermingled into a beautiful web.
I can easily say that On Stranger Tides lived up to the greatness of At World's End... but perhaps just that much.
Let's start with the acting and cast. The acting in On Stranger Tides matches if not surpasses that present in the previous three films. Johnny Depp and Penelope Cruz play the roles of the insano, ultimate B-A pirate legend Jack Sparrow and Angelica, daughter of the ruthless pirates Blackbeard, respectively. The chemistry between these characters, in love, anger (lots of this), and arguing is portrayed extremely well, especially with the two characters' conflicting characteristics and backgrounds. Several of the lovable minor pirates return, such as Barbossa and Gibbs, though the one-eyed pirate and his friend are just a few members of the Black Pearl who do not grace the camera with their appearance this time around. Also, as I'm sure yo uare aware, neither Will Turner nor Elizabeth Swan appear this time around... GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH.
On Stranger Tides also brings around a few new characters, but so many that it makes us forget the connection with the previous films and constant characters. This is a huge plus in the in-universe cast, as it is a common mistake in a sequel to add a ton of new characters into the cast that makes the film far inferior to the original. Most notable is the new female lead, Angelica. After Elizabeth Swan was confirmed to not be a member of this film, many fans worried that the... "appeal" of the film would drop significantly. Well, I can definitely guarantee it did not--not a single bit, in fact. Angelica, portrayed by none other than Penelope Cruz, is the daughter of the dark and evil pirate Blackbeard, as well as a former lover of Jack Sparrow. Angelica shares Jack Sparrow's mission in this film, and several other parallels are drawn between them--their dress, the hints at their past relationship. their feelings toward Blackbeard, and even the way they treat some minor characters.
And that brings us to Angelica's father: Black FREAKING Beard. Blackbeard is a villain not at all unlike a video game villain--his ship's crew doesn't even know what he looks like because he has never come out of his personal chambers to see them. He is secretive to them, very ambiguous. However, he arrives at a time of conflict, immediately putting an end to an entire, all out, full scale PIRATE SHIP WAR by just walking out of his room. Yes, he's that intimidating. Even Captain Jack Sparrow shows a little fear and shock toward Blackbeard at first, which is quite a contrast from his daring and bold attitude toward... well, every other character in the series. Blackbeard travels with his daughter Angelica, the first mate of his pirate ship, and also seeks what his daughter and Jack seek.
This goal so seeked by Jack, Angelica, Blackbeard, and Barbossa is the Fountain of Youth--a fountain that, as we have always been supposed to assume, gives those who drink from it eternal life. The movie actually shatters that, but that comes along later in the movie. Where we last left off, Jack Sparrow goes off independently with a complex map made of several circles to find the Fountain of Youth. However, that doesn't seem to be going so well for him. At the movie's opening, Jack's right-hand pirate, Gibbs, is being put to trial and certain death for being a pirates, as piracy has been made illegal by the English. However, it is quite a shock when a bit of dramatic irony occurs--Jack Sparrow is the judge, who plays and toys with his friend Gibbs until he learns of Jack's identity. In a swish of characteristic maneuvering, Jack gets Gibbs and himself sent to prison. Along the way, we learn something very important--Jack gave up looking for the Fountain of Youth, a task so difficult even he couldn't accomplsih it...
... by himself. Several scene transitions later, Jack ends up with an audience to the leader of the Holy Roman Empire, the organization outlawing and killing pirates for piracy. After taunting and arguing with the Englishmen, Barbossa storms in, now a member of the Royal Navy, reprising his antagonist status that he abandoned in At World's End. Barbossa reveals his intentions of finding the Fountain of Youth as well, for the purpose of gaining an upper hand in the English's rivalry with the Spanish. I absolutely love the historical accuracy and presence in On Stranger Tides. It was introduced in At World's End, but it is expanded in great detail and as a movie element in this entry of the Pirates series.
Jack escapes the hold of the English after a grand chase, and works with Gibbs to recruit a crew. In the midst of this searching, he learns that the Fountain of Youth is more complex than simply "drink the water, live forever." No, instead Jack will have to bring along two specific silver chalices and a mermaid's tear. Oh, and he also meets his former lover, Angelica. However, when Jack Sparrow alone pursues Angelica, he gets dragged onto her ship--or rather, Blackbeard's ship--as a lowly crew-mate, a very low position for Captain Jack Sparrow. Quickly, though certainly not quick for Sparrow, the new crewmember starts a fight aboard the ship by deducing that Blackbeard is actually not on the ship--after all, nobody has seen him aboard the ship before. This is quickly ended when Blackbeard simply walks out of his room, shattering such a movement and proving his existence. Meanwhile, Gibbs joins the English in their search for the Fountain of Youth against the Spanish in order to save his own life.
Both ships head to White Cap Bay, a small coast where mermaids live. Along the way, Jack learns another pierce of information that shatters our stereotype of the Fountain of Youth--it does not grant eternal life. Instead, the Fountain of Youth involves a transfer of life--think of it as the Law of Conservation of Life. There are two chalices--both containing water from the Fountain, but only one containing the mermaid's tear. Two people drink from the chalices, and the one who drinks form the tearless cup will die--the remaining years of their life are transferred to the one who drank from the cup with the mermaid's tear. Anyway, another stereotype is shattered at White Cap Bay: mermaids. Mermaids are supposed to be sweet maids that wear shell bras, have brightly colored hair, fish tails, beautiful voices, even more beautiful bodies, and are good, loving, peaceful creatures. Yeah that's wrong. Turns out mermaids actually seduce men, then drown them and eat their faces--or, rather, their entire bodies. Blackbeard's crew is attacked quickly by mermaids who seduce them, though are denied their prey by a last minute reprisal. The mermaids then turn into flying snake water demons. After a lot of fighting with flying snake ladies, Blackbeard's crew manages to capture one, just one, mermaid. There were, by the way, probably a hundred mermaids, and they caught one. Hooray for efficiency!
The captured mermaid, Syrena, falls in love with the lone Christian missionary in the crew: Philip. Though mermaids typically see humans only as prey, Syrena learns to care for and love Philip. This proves to be an effective side-plot to the main action, since it constantly intertwines with the journey. Anyway, the next journey reveals a horrible revelation for both Barbossa and Blackbeard: the Spanish beat them to the silver chalices. Barbossa and Jack end up together in a forest, captured, in a scene in which Barbossa reveals that he wants to kill Blackbeard, as the ruthless pirate is the one who caused him to lose his leg. The two decide to work together--just like in At World's End--to kill Blackbeard and claim the Fountain of Youth for themselves. I must attack the film at this point for recycling a dramatic plot twist. Barbossa, the villain from the first film, already turned into a protagonist during At World's End, and it really wasn't that amazing this time around.
Shortly afterwords, while the two are away, Syrena is tricked into shedding a tear, which is an interesting moment for the plot. While this does mean that Jack and his party are closer to the Fountain of Youth, the pathos of the moment and the scene make the audience sad for Syrena, and angry at Blackbeard--though Blackbeard is portrayed, ironically, as an antagonist anyway. On a better note that still helps Jack, Sparrow manages to take the chalices out of the hands of the Spanish--in a most hilarious manner as well. Still, Syrena is left to die, and even Philip is helpless to save her.
Now, with everything they need, Blackbeard's party heads for the shrine with the two silver chalices and mermaid's tear. After making a death jump and toying with a voodoo doll of Jack, Jack, Angelica, Blackbeard, and the ship's crew arrive at the map's location for the shrine. Jack Sparrow once again receives a comical scene to show his odd brilliance--at least, that's what I'm going to call it. Brilliance. A portal to the... "realm" of the Fountain of Youth is opened by Jack, and the group ventures in. This is it, they found it! Jack never fails, he always gets what he comes for and sets out to attain! Why? Because he's JACK FRIGGIN' SPARROW, ODION.
... Oh yeah, and then this glorious moment is then shattered by the arrival of the Spanish almost immediately after Blackbeard's group-also Barbossa comes in here at some point with his group. In the midst of the battle between Barbossa and Blackbeard's crews--a battle for revenge over Barbossa's missing limb--the Spanish arrive and destroy the Fountain of Youth, claiming that nothing can give eternal life but God. Again, I love the historical presence and featuring of the importance of religious action to the Spanish in this time period in world history.
Barbossa succeeds in severely wounding Blackbeard, bringing him to near death. Angelica proves something that is often true about beautiful women in epic movies: you can't be beautiful and intelligent, or beautiful and fortunate. Angelica ends up slashing her hand with a poisoned sword, bring her near her death as well. Jack, being the only sensible one here, of all people, brings the two filled chalices to the dying relatives, telling them to make up their mind. Blackbeard, being the jerk that this movie has been making him to be, drinks from the chalices with the tear, granting him Angelica's remaining life. Angelica, foolishly oblivious to her father's obvious lack of love for her, drinks from the other chalice. However, Jack made a move nobody was expecting: he accidentally switched the chalices. Blackbeard dies, and Angelica is given several extra years of life, from her crazy pa-pa no less.
The rest of the movie ties it all up. Barbossa escapes with Blackbeard's ship and crew, off to journey to Tortuga. Philip journeys backwards from everyone else and finds Syrena. After pleading for forgiveness, Syrena forgives him in the best way she can: drowning him and then eating him underwater. Charming. Finally, though, Jack drops Angelica off on a tiny little island in the middle of a trade route with no food, water, or way of traveling. Jack says to simply wave to a passing trade ship when it passes by to be saved. Angelica does something so freaking hilarious at this point: makes up a bunch of random crap to save herselp, including but not limited to:
Jack, there is a treasure chest!
Jack, there are jewels that can control the tide!
Jack, these jewels can also control the wind!
Jack, I'm with child!
Jack, I love you!
The penultimate one is the most hilarious, of course. The two profess their love for each... and then Jack strands her by leaving on a small wooden ship. He meets up with Gibbs on an unknown island. Blackbeard had a habit of keeping all of the ships that he defeated--including the Black Pearl. Not only did Gibbs reclaim the Black Pearl, but also stole every other ship Blackbeard had claimed. Finally, Jack sums up his own nature, the very nature of piracy, by explaining why he didn't take youthfulness from the Fountain for himself. Jack explains that by claiming this extra life, he would have less to search for and something more on his side, making the journey less exciting and less bold and rash, as is his nature. "Savvy?"
On Stranger Tides was a surprisingly fantastic movie, appealing in its acting, characters, visuals, soundtrack, and effective plot. However, as an addendum to the plot comment, I do wish to add one thing. The plot needed better bridging between events. Perhaps this could have been done in scenes between docking while the ships were at sea. I felt that, at times, events were being switched to too quickly, with no events to bring them together or establish what is happening between them clearly enough. The plot also did a lot of recycling from previous plots in the series.
Altogether, though, fantastic movie. I highly recommend this movie. Whether you've seen previous films or not, you will surely be entertained by even the basic elements of this movie...
Savvy?
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